Why is Emotional Intelligence So Important?
As we know, it’s not the smartest people who are the most successful or the most fulfilled in life. You probably know people who are academically brilliant and yet are socially inept and unsuccessful at work or in their personal relationships. Intellectual ability or your intelligence quotient (IQ) isn’t enough on its own to achieve success in life. Yes, your IQ can help you get into college, but it’s your emotional intelligence (EQ) that will help you manage the stress and emotions when facing your final exams.
Exploring and developing emotional intelligence not only makes us happier and more successful, but it helps us motivate ourselves, manage stress more effectively and resolve conflict with others. It:
Gives us the skills to be able to encourage, comfort, discipline and face different kinds of people appropriately in different situations.
Determines how effectively we express our emotions within the cultural contexts of our family, our workplace and our community.
Determines how well people listen to us and how well we are heard.
Each day, in your personal and business lives, you are presented with opportunities and challenges that require maneuvering internal as well as external obstacles. Your emotional intelligence enables you to maneuver those obstacles successfully and to persevere over the toughest challenges.
Do you pay attention to your emotions and the feelings of those around you?
The answer to this question can help you discover how in tune you are with your emotions. Becoming aware of your emotions can help you become attuned to your own needs and the needs of others, and can help you make better decisions and develop better relationships.
This is called Emotional Intelligence.
When you are intelligent about your emotions, you’re aware that the hardest work is managing the emotions that get in the way of your best you.
So, what exactly is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions and those of the people around you. It’s about using your emotions intelligently, to gain the performance you wish to see within yourself and to achieve interpersonal effectiveness with others.
People with a high degree of emotional intelligence know what they’re feeling, what their emotions mean and how these emotions can affect other people.
Emotional Intelligence explains why – despite equal intellectual capacity, training and experience – some people excel while others do not.
Understanding how Emotional Intelligence affects:
Your performance at school, work and/or personal life: High emotional intelligence can help you navigate the social complexities of life/workplace, lead and motivate others, and excel in your personal life and career. You might be surprised to know that many companies now rate emotional intelligence as important as technical ability and employ EQ testing before hiring.
Your physical health: If you’re unable to manage your emotions, you are probably not managing your stress either. This can lead to serious health problems. Uncontrolled stress raises blood pressure, suppresses the immune system, increases the risk of heart attacks and strokes, contributes to infertility, and speeds up the aging process. The first step to improving emotional intelligence is to learn how to manage stress.
Your mental health: Uncontrolled emotions and stress can also impact your mental health, making you vulnerable to anxiety and depression. If you are unable to understand, get comfortable with, or manage your emotions, you’ll also struggle to form strong relationships. This in turn can leave you feeling lonely and isolated and further exacerbate any mental health problems.
Your relationships: By understanding your emotions and how to control them, you’re better able to express how you feel and understand how others are feeling. This allows you to communicate more effectively and forge stronger relationships, both at work and in your personal life.
Your social intelligence: Being in tune with your emotions serves a social purpose, connecting you to other people and the world around you. Social intelligence enables you to recognize friend from foe, measure another person’s interest in you, reduce stress, balance your nervous system through social communication, and feel loved and happy.
Emotional Intelligence is not about being nice, nor is it about suppressing emotions; it is a proactive approach to managing emotions to achieve better results. Put simply, emotions drive behavior and behavior drives performance.
EQ is a skill. Like any other skill, anyone can get better at it with training and practice.
It begins by understanding and mastering the four elements of Emotional Intelligence.
It requires effort and commitment; it’s a lifelong journey.
The capacity to improve one’s emotional intelligence actually increases over time.
As people mature, life experiences broaden their capacity for emotional understanding.
An individual must choose to learn and develop in the emotional intelligence areas.
What are the four elements of Emotional Intelligence?
The graphic below represents the four elements of Emotional Intelligence. Each element falls under either Personal Competence or Social Competence.
Personal (Self) Competence: Self Awareness and Self-Management
My ability to maintain awareness of my emotions and manage my behavior.
Social Competence: Social Awareness and Relationship Management
My ability to understand others (including their moods, behaviors and emotions) in order to improve relationships.
