How to Stop Negative Thinking
Negative thinking is not a way of being that we actively choose. I have not met a person that says, “Hey, I want to be a negative person. I want to only choose negative thoughts and speak negatively about my life.”
Negative thinking creeps in and seems to hijack our minds leaving us with a negative outlook on life.
If you are like me, having a negative outlook or hearing negative thinking in our own minds, is painful.
About 5 years ago I reconnected with a friend I used to work with at one of my early corporate jobs. We decided to catch up over lunch. At the lunch we had the typical conversion about our marriages, kids, the trajectory our lives had taken over the years. And then he asked if he could be honest with me about something he wanted me to know.
Usually, that statement would be met with a nervousness and draw-back effect fearing the person may share something that would sting a little too deep. Yet, I trusted Chris and his insights and wanted to hear what he had to offer.
“Tina Marie, when we were at Dynegy, you seemed to complain about your life so much. It was hard to be around you sometimes and I felt bad dodging your invitations to lunch or to go work out. The truth is your negativity back then was hard to be with.” His share stung a bit yet he was absolutely right. I remember how my main stories were sad ones and those that left me feeling drained. If I felt drained after my own conversation, I could imagine how Chris felt.
“And now, I am so happy to see that you are happy. You seem like a totally new person, Tina Marie. It’s so good to be having positive, lively conversation with you. I wanted you to know.”
Chris was right. It was hard being with me back in that season of my life. And he was also right that I was now very happy, and I now met the negativity in my life with new strategies.
Have you ever known yourself to be a ‘Debbie downer’?
Have you ever heard the conversations you were having and wish you could stop telling the sad story version of your life?
Have you ever wanted to know how to transform your thinking to stop the negativity and find positivity instead?
I learned that in order to stop my negativity, I had to take action and realize I was not a victim of life, I still had power. I share with you the steps I took and now take action, to stop negative thinking before it overwhelms my life.
In order to stop ( and transform ) negative thinking we must do this five-part action list.
Admit the truth. We must own the truth that we are the ones telling the sad story, either inside our own minds or externally to others. We must own that we are perpetuating our own sad story every time we tell it.
Choose. We must decide that we want to no longer be the complainer, gossiper, sad outlook seeing person and decide that we want to shift our own perspective to create a new, more empowered outcome.
Be the change. As Nelson Mandela said, we must be the change we want to see in the world. If we find ourselves complaining, not being happy about something, gossiping, commiserating with others, we must look squarely at what we are not happy about and choose to do one thing to make a positive change on that item. We must become part of the solution and not be one that is sustaining the problem.
Protect the good. Condition our minds to see what is good, what is working, what is a blessing. We must do all we can to learn mental strategies to recondition the mind to think positively and constructively. Taking back our power over energy-draining beliefs, thoughts, habits and patterns is the first action step to owning the pathway to a new life.
Forgive. We must forgive ourselves for our past doings. None of us can go back into the past and change what has already been spoken, thought, or done. What we can do is forgive ourselves for those past negative ways of being. You did the best you could with what you had and what you knew. Now you choose more powerful, positive actions and thoughts.
Committing to control our own thinking and master our minds will create immediate positive results in all areas of our lives. Our mental faculties are like a network of muscles that can be honed and strengthened. Mastering our own thoughts is crucial to overall mental, emotional, and spiritual happiness. Our inner peace is not fleeting when we know the true capacity of our human energy. Most people never gain awareness that their circumstances, environment, and lives are a direct response to the mind control they possess.
Through your connection to The Bonfire, our precise tools and methods, and your application of them, you will surely create the life you would love to live and help others do the same.
Use this five-point system to heal negative thinking in your life and report back to us how your life has shifted. We love hearing your success stories!
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Bonfire is a system of human dynamic tools that our unique coaching methodology is founded on. From the use of these tools our clients reach amazing results in record time, experience joy, fulfillment and wonder like never before and develop a strong sense of confidence, purpose and connection. Come discover The Bonfire.
